Day 17
Abide
And do thou (O reader!) bring thy Lord to remembrance in thy (very) soul, with humility and in reverence, without loudness in words, in the mornings and evenings; and be not thou of those who are unheedful. Those who are near to thy Lord, disdain not to do Him worship: they celebrate His praises and bow down before Him. (Sura Al-Araf, 7:205-6, Yusuf Ali translation)
And bethink thyself of thy Sustainer humbly and with awe, and without raising thy voice, at morn and at evening; and do not allow thyself to be heedless. Behold, those who are near unto thy Sustainer are never too proud to worship him; and they extol His limitless glory, and prostrate themselves before Him [alone]. (Asad translation)
Please excuse my tardiness today. It’s been an intense day witnessing how Allah uses our bodies to speak to us. When our bodies are in crisis of any kind, what is our tendency? When you get that headache, or that toothache or that stomachache or that painful constipation, what do you think? It is simply unfortunate happenstance? I don’t believe so. As I don’t believe in randomness or coincidence, every single ache or pain in our body is an opportunity. It may not feel like it as you make your way through it moment by moment, but it is. There have been times that I have been in so much pain that I could only groan and talk myself through one breath at a time. A few years ago I had a long bout of knee problems. Nothing seemed to help. About 3 years into it, my mother asked me “why are you having this problem? What do you feel unstable about in your life?” That was the very first time I’d connected the dots and considered that maybe it wasn’t simply a trial I had to endure, but a message to decode. Once I took the time to really think about my mother’s questions, doors to healing that I hadn’t seen before opened up immediately. Ya Shafi, Ya Shafi, Ya Shafi! Next time you have a headache, talk to Allah. What is it that you are reluctant to let go of? Next time you have a stomachache, talk to Allah? What is it that is causing such anxiety in your life?
During today’s crisis, there was prayer and tears on the way to surrender (I can’t do this Allah, only you can do this). Afterwards, I lay drained and stared at a wall. I realized that as my mind was moving on, it was also reverting to a space of selective remembrance. I was thinking about this or that thing, and had so easily moved on from witnessing that deep surrender. Surrender to Allah! Surrender to Allah! Surrender to Allah in all things, at all moments! La ilaha illallah! Allah is the only Reality. It is for us to remember Allah in all things, at all moments, challenging, joyful and everything in between. “…bring thy Lord to remembrance in thy very soul” We are called to abide in that place of remembrance. The Quran tells us that all of creation praises Allah whether we know it or not. A tree is in constant praise, a toad, a mosquito, even someone who identifies as an atheist. Praise is the inherent state of our soul. How do we cultivate consciousness of the one true Reality in what Piers Anthony calls Mundania? When you’re cleaning the bathroom, when you’re running out for milk, when you’re doing everything? This is the purpose of dhikr. To abide, truly and deeply abide in a state of taqwa, of God-consciousness requires us to dispense with the illusion that any aspect of our lives is separate from Allah. Every aspect of our lives is Allah. Our very being is Allah! What a marvel! Who are we to indulge in the arrogance of forgetfulness?
Ya Allah, Ya Allah, Ya Allah! Allahumma, remove from me the veils of forgetfulness and illusion. Do not allow me to be in any state of heedlessness. Amin.
